harmony for change

The start of the new year coincided with the need for a new notebook. I had drifted away from daily use of a notebook and pen for lists, podcast notes, and other random brain dumps, instead appreciating that my phone and computer notes sync with one another. But I began noticing that, even though this simple notebook has never been a journal, the absence of putting pen to paper (even if only to make a note of something I wanted to do later on the computer) was creating an internal bottleneck for me. So recently, I have been starting my day with a little writing by candle light, followed by exercise. I take my journal and this notebook to the table with a cup of tea and a candle, to get my thoughts out for the day. This has been key for me, uncorking words that have been stuck for a long time now. I have been feeling the need, for some time now, to unlock some things that have welled up inside, but that I have been holding back. I thought I had been moving through things smoothly, but comments from each of my three people (two little and one big) were painfully startling to me, making me realize that feelings I think I have been hiding, have actually been bubbling over more often than I think.

This is the year of harmony, but I have been feeling strongly that this will be a big year of change. I am seeing it all around me in the lives of others I know, I am seeing it in my own life and in my bottled thoughts, we are feeling it following the election, and I am feeling s sense of it, deep down. I think some of the change will be good, some bad, and some will be unexpected. Some might be welcome, some resisted. So at the moment, I am trying to focus on balance, on harmony, and on acceptance, and on releasing a little more to pen and paper.