light

I have thought a lot about how 2019 felt for me, how I want 2020 to feel, and I have thought about a lot of different words to hold in my mind and heart for 2020. 2019 was a year of a lot of change. Not the sort of change I could write about in our holiday newsletter, but changes of big and small kinds more intimate to our little family. It also held the kind of small changes that pave the way for bigger changes. I worked hard to be present through it all.

Oddly enough, I wrote part of a post about change in April, which I never posted. It is here, below.

I have been thinking about feeling behind, feeling stuck, progress, and change a lot this past year or so. 

As part of our read-aloud, we read poetry. When I read this some months ago, it held in my mind. It reminded me of the Rumi poem, A Guest House, and also of the quote by L.R. Knost (which is at the top of my homeschool planning/prepping Evernote pages). For some reason, this poem left me feeling as though the uphill climb, the sense of treading water, is normal, and there is company and care in each step.

Up-Hill

By Christina Rossetti

Does the road wind up-hill all the way?

   Yes, to the very end.

Will the day’s journey take the whole long day?

   From morn to night, my friend.

But is there for the night a resting-place?

   A roof for when the slow dark hours begin.

May not the darkness hide it from my face?

   You cannot miss that inn.

Shall I meet other wayfarers at night?

   Those who have gone before.

Then must I knock, or call when just in sight?

   They will not keep you standing at that door.

Shall I find comfort, travel-sore and weak?

   Of labour you shall find the sum.

Will there be beds for me and all who seek?

   Yea, beds for all who come.

I think I am mentally a little resistant to choosing the word change because it feels forced and rushed and, if I am honest, I am not fully ready for some of the bigger changes that I know are inevitably coming. And so, I am mulling on change, but I am giving space around this word, this idea, and allowing my anchor word for 2020 to be something a little gentler, but equally important and certainly related and relevant in my world right now.

My word for 2020 is light. This word can apply to so many parts of my life right now, particularly as a melancholic, sentimental, deep-thinker and feeler. I look forward into 2020, a new decade, and I see a lot going on for our family, and I hope that holding this word close will help remind me to keep things simple, bright, and positive, if I am able. It was these images I had in mind, when I renamed my blog, Creative. Light. Less. several years ago. I want to move lightly on this earth, live lighter (less clutter, less spending), lighten my mood, my heart, my thinking. I imagine the light of a candle when my world feels dark, the light of a camp or hearth fire when my world feels cold.

One of the other words I considered was namaste, which I first learned to roughly mean "the good and the light in me sees and honors the good and the light in you." I think this imagery is so powerful and beautiful. There is light again. I want to pay attention to the light in others.

2019 was my 10th year of choosing a word for my head and heart. My guiding  words so far have been calm (2010), nourish (2011), hope (2012), renewal (2013), treasure (2014), joy (2015), potato (really, humor and laughter...potato was a family joke, 2016), harmony (2017), happy (with expectations and boundaries being the foundation, 2018), and present (being present in the moment and giving presents of restorative self-care to myself, 2019). 

Each of these words holds meaning and memories for me, which brings both a smile to my face and tears to my eyes.

I wish you all light, love, peace, and simplicity as we shift into a whole new decade.

learning period 2: 2019-2020

Learning period 2, October and November, 2019. I wrote part of this post back in early November and fleshing out the remainder of a short summary in late December. Clearly, it didn't get posted when it should have, so I will be back-dating the post to be time appropriate.

We spent much of last year really exploring and addressing Lala Bugs differences, needs, and exploring high school options that worked to address those in a healthy way. We made a lot of progress and experienced a lot of growth together, and she is bravely moving forward. Now, it is Brown Mouse’s turn. He and his sister are so different, but they both have some learning differences. So right now, we are working to identify and address his differences. He has possible dyslexia and likely dysgraphia, so evaluations and appointments are taking some extra time.

Both kids are in a group reading Shakespeare's Macbeth.While both kids love Shakespeare, Macbeth has not been a favorite of Lala Bug's. Blood, killing, and greed don't appeal to her and one can sense she is disturbed by Macbeth's selfish acts and Lady Macbeth pushing her husband to do sinister things. Brown Mouse has been more engaged with it. With the kids in two different schooling situations this year, both will be covering Macbeth, but in different ways. Lala Bug has gone to see a local performance of it with her school and will be learning, discussiing, and writing about Macbeth as it compares to Twelfth Night, a comedy. Brown Mouse will be part of a Shakespeare class that will ultimately perform Macbeth.

Both kids are also in soccer and 4-H.

Lala Bug has been adjusting to taking some classes at a small high school and while the adjustment has been challenging, she and we like the school and staff and she is thriving academically. She is getting her math and science (biology) outside the home. She has also been taking dance, her first autumn of doing both dance and soccer. I am hesitant to declare that as a success. She loves both, but has been running very tired and her sleep is 'off.' 

 

Brown Mouse has been taking an ecology class and a tall ships history class through our charter, and both have been a success. for his other subjects, he has been using Key To workbooks and ALEKS for math at home, learning more about American history, and we have been doing a language arts loop of skill-strengthening activities specific to his learning needs.

Onward into December, which boasts a variety of celebrations for our family and a welcomed break from the everyday lesson activities.