{Creatively living lightly with less.}
Every year, since 2010, I have chosen a word of the year. Every year, I blog a little about it.
This year, not so much. I am posting the link to the post to my word for 2024, Open, and that starts a chain of links, backing up in time, where you can read more, if you so desire.
I am keeping it basic this year for this blog post, and am simply saying that my word for 2025 is
Discover
This post was first written and posted to my original blog, Which Name?, on July 22, 2010. I selected it to re-post now, in the midst of a conversation in a beloved mamas group about our need for alone, restorative time. One mama mentioned this book, I chimed in that I used to re-read it, and I remembered that I had blogged about it. Fourteen years ago(!) I was struck by its relevance and it is still relevant today. What does that mean about a mother's/woman's changing needs (or lack of change) over time? The time of our own lives, but also over the time since this book was written, nearly 70 years ago?
Summer brought a change in pace, activities, time, and energy this year.
I've felt a bit pulled in multiple directions, feeling always "on" with
my children, craving a vacation. Craving time alone.
I have
always felt guilty with this need. After all, I am incredibly fortunate
to be home with my children. There are days I send a very reluctant Mike
off to work and I am reminded, again, what a gift he is giving me.
Although they can be trying (I've given up attempting to keep my house
clean this summer. I have been too busy on damage control), our children
are also very sweet, are the best of friends, and I am blessed to have
the time with them to truly know them.
But it can be tiring, giving of oneself to others without enough personal rejuvenation.
I have carved out time for creating, often with the kids, but I have had little time alone, to just sit and be.
What time I have stolen (because truly, it feels as though I am taking
time from someone else (my husband?) or something else (sleep,
perhaps?) to make it so), I have been reading.
I have just finished A Gift from the Sea, by Anne Morrow Lindbergh.
I
have always considered myself a mountain and forest girl first, despite
growing up by the ocean, but in recent months, it has been the sea and
sand I have been craving for rejuvenation.
I cannot express how
perfect this book was for me to read at this time. Set by the ocean,
with the ocean as the theme, Lindbergh discusses being a woman. Perhaps
what amazed me most is that this book was written in 1955, yet still
managed to touch so many pieces of my own life today. How poignantly
history is woven into the now. It will probably always be this way in
some way.
I want to share with you with some quotes from the book.
"…Today, more of us in America
than anywhere else in the world have the luxury of choice between
simplicity and complication of life. And for the most part, we, who
could choose simplicity, choose complication.”
“Every person, especially every woman, should be alone sometime during the year, some part of each week, and each day. How revolutionary that sounds and how impossible of attainment. To many women, such a program seems quite out of reach.”
“Moon shell…You will remind me that I need to be alone for part of each year, even a week or a few days; and for part of each day, even for an hour or a few minutes in order to keep my core, my center, my island-quality. You will remind me that unless I keep the island-quality intact somewhere within me, I will have little to give my husband, my children, my friends or the world at large.”
“What
release to write so that one forgets oneself, forgets one’s companion,
forgets where one is or what one is going to do next…”
“We have so little faith in the ebb and flow of life, of love, of relationships. We leap at the flow of the tide and resist in terror at its ebb. We are afraid it will never return. We insist on permanency, on duration, on continuity; when the only continuity possible, in life, as in love, is in growth, in fluidity – in freedom…”
“…each cycle of the tide is valid; each cycle of the wave is valid; each cycle of a relationship is valid.”
“My life…lacks this quality of significance because there is so little empty space. The space is scribbled on; the time has been filled. There are so few empty pages in my engagement pad, or empty hours in the day, or empty rooms in my life in which to stand alone and find myself….it is not merely the trivial that clutters our lives, but the important as well.”
With those words of wisdom, written 55 years ago and still so poignant for me today, I am stepping offline to spend some time at my "island." Each year since I was an infant, my family has spent part of the summer up in the mountains at a lakeside cabin, accessible by boat or foot only, with no power or hot water.
2024 marks my 15th year of choosing a word for the year ahead. (My first word was Calm in 2010.)
Last year,
I chose three words; strengthen, possibilities, and purpose. I had a
hard time selecting one and I thought the three complimented each other,
but that didn't work for me. I forgot my words and kept returning to
older words when in meditation.
This year, my word is Open. I don't think it is the most exciting word, but it kept coming to me as we closed out 2023, and even a perusal through the thesaurus brought me back to Open. It is simple and I like simple.
In 2024, I want to be Open to possibilities, growth, opportunities, growth, open spaces, bravery, and being open-minded.
This year, I have a beautiful new notebook to use, handmade by Lala Bug, complete with a handmade book cover, almost entirely from recycled materials. Something special. Wishing you well in 2024.
We have entered our 12th year of home learning!
This year, Brown Mouse is in 10th grade and Lala Bug has moved out of high school and declared her major in apparel design and merchandising.
After expressing interest in heading to a brick and mortar school for the rest of high school (a door we left open by homeschooling through a charter school), lots of conversations, visiting schools, narrowing down choices, and sitting in classrooms, Brown Mouse opted to continue homeschooling. He's got a full load with geometry, physics, English, U.S. history, life skills/transition, P.E., and driver's ed. He is biking (mountain and road), always, and is back in soccer after an injury, playing with the team he has been part of since he was 8. And he will be assistant soccer coaching with the skills coach he began playing with at age 6!
Lala Bug began taking college classes in high school and chose to continue, selecting math, pattern draping, and fashion sketching for this year, majoring in apparel design and merchandising. So far, we have been impressed with the program, the staff, and the disabled student services, and feel lucky to have a solid niche program so close to home. She has continued building skills and making beautiful items (knits, fashion, books, and more) and I am working with her on her small business and entrepreneurial goals. She is also mountain and road biking.
That is our little nutshell as we propel into this learning year!
Lala Bug has been learning at home since mid-way through 2nd grade, 8 years old. In our homeschool (and let me emphasize that every homeschool is different for so many reasons, most importantly because every human and family is different), we stuck with 'grade levels,' because, for the most part, we homeschooled with the support of charter schools. (Technically, this means that our kids have been public schooled students of the charter schools, and have always been had assignments, accountability, testing, etc.) This spring, Lala Bug completed 12th grade, high school.
We have been UsSchoolers (once I settled in and let go) and Lala Bug has been loathe to make any sort of 'deal' out of graduating, but as homeschoolers, her education has been my education and it feels like something I/we need to celebrate. I am sharing here, since this has been my space and my record of quite a long (blink!) journey. I have been blogging for over 15 years, so have captured a lot. She graduated with all the things educators worry about (high GPA, plenty of credits, well rounded), yes, but what has mattered far more to us has been helping our kids find passion, direction, interest in learning, self-advocacy, and more. She has been dual-enrolled in an apparel design and merchandising program and has declared that as her major. She'll continue living at home and receiving support as needed, so...grade 13?
So proud of this human who has (and will always have to) overcome a tremendous number of challenges, will always have to work with her differences in a neurotypical world.
Note: I wrote this on New Year's Eve morning, and that is when I am scheduling this to appear as posted, however several days have passed, and, in actuality, it is January 7 today. Since writing this, our area/state has been hit with a series of serious storms, causing significant damage and some loss of life. I don't want to be insensitive to that or to growing concerns about additional storms coming, but I am going to let this post as it was when I wrote it.
I am in our dim, early morning kitchen, with a soft, faux lantern on, sitting next to the window in a chair covered with a soft sheepskin (bought for me when I was about 12), listening to the sound of the rain. It is incredibly soothing. Deep in drought, it's filling my soul just a little bit, to hear the rain splatter, although we are anticipating a storm here in our area.
We've come upon December 31st in a bit of a blink. Usually, I have been mentally toying around with and considering words for the year ahead for a couple of weeks, but this year, it has just been a couple of days.
For 2022, my word has been Change, and it has been so appropriate. When Brown Mouse graduated from our homeschool charter, we all moved on from that community. M experienced employment change and rediscovering of self (much to the benefit of his health and our family connection). We are now book-ending high school. We experienced our first year with Biscuit dog. Mountain biking moved from something we enjoyed to a primary focus. Lala Bug said farewell (for now) to her long time dance studio. Lots of change.
For 2023, I find I can't limit myself to one word and I am having trouble choosing. Part of me wants to simply say my word for the year is Me. While I know I need to give more attention to myself in a number of ways, the word doesn't feel broad enough to embody how I want to approach the year. To start 2023, I have chosen Strengthen as my primary word. I want to strengthen my self-care, my boundaries, our rhythms, our long-term goals, my connections, etc. I know more Change is coming, though, and with the desire to Strengthen comes a need for an openness to Possibilities and I have a growing desire for Purpose. (Purpose was the first word that came to me, of these three, and I find I am resisting it, which tells me that is all the more reason to explore that a little more.)
Choosing a word has worked for me for years now (since 2010), instead of setting resolutions. A word is a mental anchor for me. It feels simple and broad enough for those times my mind is getting away from me. I am a deep thinker and feeler, so a word (or, in this case, three words) to meditate on can help me to keep moving forward.
Wishing you all the best in 2023.
2022 has been such a year of change (my word for the year)! This year, our family outgrew our beloved K-8 charter school. (And our teacher retired...We always told her she could not retire until Brown Mouse graduated! 😘) We went through the process of applying to, visiting, and considering in-person high schools for Brown Mouse. Just as happened with Lala Bug as she moved into 9th grade, it was I who wanted to pursue exploring school and the kids who wanted to continue homeschooling. So...we are still homeschooling and still with a homeschool-supporting charter school, although this charter has a whole different vibe and is not the center of our community.
This year we have a kiddo in 12th grade (part 1) and one in 9th grade. Two high schoolers! (And a tag-along doggo, who makes the hard stuff more bearable.) Both kids have neuro-differences, but completely different ones! They keep us fresh and creative with how we approach things and it leads to many conversations and lifestyle pivots as we try to address, support, encourage, and grow as individuals and as a family.
Our 12th grader is working through "course work" for Life Skills, language/culture, World Geography, English, Art, and a community college course that covers history and fashion. She will be doing Health and perhaps another community college class during winter/spring. Her neuro-differences means that we work with her to keep the demands and expectations light and in balance with physical activity and her need to counter sensory overwhelm.
Our 9th grader is working through "course work" for Life Skills, World Geography, Biology, Algebra 1, English, and Art. He will be doing Health during winter/spring. He does a lot of tinkering on bikes and remote control cars and we were hoping for a bike mechanics internship, but he is on the very young age for the program, so it might not work out (yet). His learning differences have him working with a specialist weekly and may have us returning to occupational therapy (OT). OT might be the most fun therapy option out there for quirky kids, because it tends to be hands-on and physical!
Both kids are mountain biking and Brown Mouse is also playing soccer this fall. Both kids are signed up for 4-H. Brown Mouse is very reluctant. I previously told him he could have the choice this year, but I am now pushing for him to participate, because our club leaders have been working hard to try to provide more to engage the teens. (Our club lost a lot of members during the pandemic and many members are younger). Also, I am leading an outdoor project and it is his sister's final year. I think this year might be our family's last in 4-H.
Resources we are using and already enjoying and/or simply appreciating include: Guest Hollow's World Geography; Blog, She Wrote's Microscopic Marvels; ck12 online flexbooks for Biology; CTCMath; Write Shop; edX (massive online course - MOOC), and various other resources for...everything!
We are off to a good start, for which I am grateful, and hope your year has begun well, too!
