thrive

 

 

2020 has been a monumental year of unexpected challenges, one after another, all around the globe. 

Each year, since 2010, I have chosen a word of the year, and for 2020, it was the word Light. (Re-reading my post and the links within it was incredibly meditative for me.) 

When I choose a word for the year, it becomes an anchor for me, so even when I am not doing enough of anything else to care well for myself, I can think of the word and consider what I envisioned when I selected it.

I have a list of possible words for 2021...really good ones, like resilience (Lala Bug's urging) and connection, but the word thrive keeps coming back to my mind.

2020 has been a year during which I have wrestled with feelings of gratitude, joy, appreciation, privilege, struggle, overwhelm, frustration, desperation, anxiety, and guilt, all in one tangled mess. I have felt as though we are surviving; working hard to stay physically healthy, stay safe (in so many versions of the word), stay employed, stay connected, all while being mindful of the mental and emotional health toll this is all taking, up and down all day, everyday now. I feel as if I am "on" 24/7, as though I am the lighthouse for my family, but my light is unstable.

I want to Thrive, so that is the word I am choosing for 2021. 

I hope you, too, thrive, in 2021 and I hope you found some glimmers of light (some silver linings) in 2020. Namaste.

brown mouse

 

 

Brown Mouse, today is your day of all days. Your humor and dimpled smile bring joy daily. I don’t take you or that feeling for granted. You’re my baby, like the engine at the back, pushing me forward through this Mama gig. Kiddo, no-one will recognize you when we can be in community again! You have grown so much this year that this is the last birthday (likely the last month!) during which I am still (slightly) taller than you are. Thank you for being your smart, kind, playful, and humorous self, wrapped in a mischievously dimple-smiled package!

holiday cheer with a countdown

 

Well 2020 certainly is winding down in a different way than expected when it began, isn't it? 

Some mama friends and I were brainstorming ways to add a little spark within our own families and spread cheer to family and friends. One of the ideas I shared is the countdown that my little family has done every December for years. 

We string numbered baby socks (but it could be anything...envelopes, a single stocking, a small basket, a stuffed animal's lap, etc.) along a strand of fairy lights for the entire month of December, through January 1 (not just through December 24/Advent, so this works for everyone, not just celebrants of Christmas, and prevents so much holiday letdown).

Each night, I put a slip of paper into the sock for the next day. Each paper slip has a message on it with an activity, craft, food, treat, outing, service, etc. for that day. Tucking the slip in the night before allows me to decide what will work for our plans and moods the following day (rather than trying to plan the entire month in advance). My kids take turns pulling out the slip.

Here are links to what we did the previous few of years; 2019, 2018, 2017.

Below is a list of ideas of things you could do for your own countdown. My own list is more specific to where we live, so I tried to generalize some of our activities for the list below. Add your own! We are coastal, so I don't have things like "build a snow creature" on our list, but you could add anything like this and skip the things below that don't apply to your family. We clearly celebrate Christmas, a little Hanukkah, and Solstice, but you could add Kwanzaa or another celebration. Also, I haven't deleted anything from my own list, so there are things that should apply for a range of ages, since my own kids are middle and high school now! (That also explains any repeats that might be on the list below!)

 

Get a Christmas tree today!

 

 

Go shopping for our ‘adopted’ family.

 

 

Make a Christmas gift or card.

 

 

Celebrate Christmas Eve. Open a present.

 

 

Happy St. Nicholas Day!

 

 

Bake cookies.

 

 

Decorate a gingerbread house.

 

 

Read a new holiday book together.

 

 

Winter Solstice! Have a lantern walk.

 

 

Winter Solstice! Celebrate light together.

 

 

Winter Solstice! Celebrate the light by keeping the power off after sun down. After sunset, use only candlelight, firelight, natural light.

 

 

Practice recorder, singing, piano, or flute. Play a Christmas carol.

 

 

Go on an outing with Grandparent(s).

 

 

Go to kid’s art studio.

 

 

Wrap a present.

 

 

Choose a toy or book we no longer need and donate it to a person in need.

 

 

Go to a Christmas party.

 

 

You deserve a treat! Ask Mamma for one!

 

 

Have a party!

 

 

Make a Christmas gift.

 

 

Care for our bird friends. Make a treat garland, clean out the chicken coop, and fill the feeders.

 

 

Go to the aquarium.

 

 

Choose a candy cane from the tree.

 

 

Draw a picture that shows what you are thankful for.

 

 

Craft with Dada.

 

 

Celebrate the season at a winter festival.

 

 

Give something to charity.

 

 

Craft today!

 

 

Have dinner in a restaurant.

 

 

Take out Christmas decorations!

 

 

Have an adventure or play date with friends.

 

 

Decorate the tree!

 

 

Merry Christmas! Buon Natale! Feliz Navidad!

 

 

Go to the winterland carousel.

 

 

Go to a holiday concert!

 

 

Change the nature table to celebrate the season.

 

 

Help a friend today!

 

 

Get out in nature!

 

 

Take a ferry ride today!

 

 

Hanukkah begins today. Light the menorah.

 

 

Go to a museum today.

 

 

Let’s do some holiday cooking or baking today!

 

 

Celebrate New Year’s Eve today.

 

 

Today is Boxing Day!

 

 

Make clove oranges today.

 

 

Pull out holiday books!

 

 

Write holiday cards for a stranger (elderly or military) to appreciate.

 

 

Write some thank you notes!

 

 

Enjoy a winter celebration from another culture and/or country.

 

 

Enjoy the lights on “Christmas Tree Lane.”  

 

 

See the hillside manger scene.

 

 

Send special mail to friends or family.

 

 

Make wool lambs.

 

 

Make corn husk angels.

 

 

Make papier mache bowls.

 

 

Make Swedish hearts.

 

 

String a popcorn garland

 

 

Make a pinecone garland.

 

 

Make paper snowflakes.

 

 

Make a lantern!

 

 

Make salt dough ornaments

 

 

Think of others today. What can you do for or say to someone else that would be especially kind?

 

 

Take care of our community. Do something kind and healthy, such as collect garbage, donate food, or volunteer.

 

 

Make walnut shell candles.

 

 

Winter crafting with our community today!

 

 

Make candles!

 

 

Make latkes and serve with applesauce.

 

 

Play dreidel!

 

 

Go get a doughnut treat!

 

 

It is time for Sparkle Stories’ audio Advent calendars!

 

 

Choose three (3) of your books to pass on to someone else. Now visit the library book store! Look for a new book for yourself and one to give as a gift.

 

 

Take a walk to a nearby store and pick out a holiday treat!

 

 

Make holiday cards!

 

 

Make a holiday gift!

 

 

Today is for the birds! Bird watch, make a bird treat, and fill the bird feeder.

 

 

Merry Making!

 

 

Treasure hunt! The first clue is:

 

 

See a holiday show today!

 

 

Practice recorder, singing, piano, drums, guitar, ukulele, or flute. Play a Christmas carol.

 

 

Decorate the exterior of the house!

 

 

Make kite paper stars.

 

 

Today is a neighborhood day! Deliver cards or treats to neighbors, pick up garbage, add (a) book(s) to the Little Library.

 

 

Bunny day! Scrub the hutch tray, brush her fur, clip her nails, give her fresh greens, and let her hop about!

 

 

Care for the garden. As needed; rake, weed, sweep, plant seeds, water, tend compost, and explore!

 

 

Have a carpet picnic and enjoy some bubbly to ring in the New Year!

 

 

Winter spiral walk tonight!

 

 

Winter candle light New Year’s wishing and star gazing tonight.

 

 

Light a candle tonight and make a wish or intention for the New Year.

 

 

Enjoy the winter sky tonight.

 

 

Buy a toy for Toys for Tots or another organization that helps children in need.

 

 

Go shopping for a child in need.

 

 

Read a favorite holiday book together.

 

 

Make “blessing bags” to hand out to those in need.

 

Make a collage (or vision board or dream garden) for the new year.

 

Decorate a little tree for your room!

 

Do a little holiday shopping today!

 

Head to the recycle/repurpose store. Can you find a gift or something to make into a gift?

 

 

Visit the lake today. What does it look like this winter? Nature study!

 

Happy New Year! How can you challenge yourself this year?

 

Make some bookmarks, then anonymously leave a stack at the library or in a ‘Little Library.’

 

It is time for Sparkle Stories’ 12 Days of Christmas stories!

 

Make some surprise goodies for friends today.

 

Treat-making day; toffee, hot chocolate spoons, and cookies?!

 

Movie day! Watch a holiday film and have a hearth fire (or candles in the fireplace).

 

Participate in the Christmas Bird Count (eBird) today!

 

 

 

light - an autumn check-in

 

I hesitated using this photo. It represents so much for me; nature, seasonal change, hope, and light. But it was one beautiful day, tucked into weeks of unprecedented wildfire smoke and poor air, trapping us inside. It feels misrepresentative.

 

I have been missing from this space for quite some time. The general changes of life in the past year or so, coupled with the pandemic, have me moving further inward. But I have been thinking a lot about my word for 2020, Light, and today, as I folded some laundry, I had a sudden urge to come and post. I don't really have collected thoughts to share, but perhaps I am not alone, as my mind wanders through a chain reaction of emotions and awareness of a need for time to process. Time that is difficult to carve out these days, despite seemingly having lots of time. (We, as parents, have taken on every role, all at once. Even those of us who homeschooled before are not experiencing life in the same way. Our spaces are small and so compactly shared right now. Those of us with high needs children are left without supports we once had. Our children don't have time with mentors they adore. And more. It is hard.)

When I chose the word Light, it was almost a transitional word for me, because the other word I considered was Change. I didn't feel ready to do the inner work involved, yet, with the word Change, but I guess Mother Earth is having a laugh on me, because this year has been all about Change. But it has also been about Light. When I chose Light, the other word that paired with it in my mind was Namaste, which I have always known to mean "the good and the light in me, sees and honors the good and the light in you." 

Isn't this a year during which we have needed to continue to see the good in others and continue to have to reach toward, lean into, walk toward light, positivity, and hope?

There has been so much darkness this year. A pandemic, many deaths as a result, chronic after-effects for many who have survived, economic pain and instability, and climate disasters. Here where I live, 4 million acres of beautiful land, burned in wildfires, many killed, homes lost, and many more displaced. It keeps coming. It is the sensation of being knocked down, bruised up, and dragging ourselves up again to keep going. It is a year of grieving so much. I am not willing to give up on 2020 yet. There are too many holidays, birthdays, achievements, and goals to be celebrated and met.

With light and hope,

N

a turn around the sun, hidden behind smoke

 

 

I love you, sweet girl. With every passing year, I realize we are born who we are and grow into ourselves. Thank you for being you, making me a Mama, and helping me grow into myself. I appreciate you so much, and as I reflect back on this past year, this crazy, surreal year, I see you have grown so much, each challenge and joy, more into yourself. I love that. 

What an odd, yet special birthday this year. As we hunkered down at home, unable to celebrate with family or friends inside because of a pandemic, or outside because of wildfire smoke and poor air quality, we ate good food (chosen by you!), ever grateful for the simple bounty we have. 

 

 

changing rhythms: homeschool 2020 - 2021

 

This spring and summer have been different (replace with your own adjective here). Even for those of us who have been fortunate enough to avoid COVD-19, even for homeschoolers, life has been twisted on its axis. All activities, travel, social opportunities, and more have been changed or canceled. Exacerbated by the pandemic, our country has had to face a forever-existing racial divide. This year has taught many of us to expect change, be flexible, new ways to relate to and understand each other, and to truly value all we are privileged to have.

And here we are, mid-August, the coming school year looming (that is what it feels like to me this year) upon us. In past years, I have had breaks from my kids (and they from me) in the summer, time to think, clean, organize, plan. I've started the year ready and enchanted. I haven't had that this year and here we are, with (home)school (year 9!) starting tomorrow. (It's Sunday afternoon as I write this.)

Why tomorrow if I am not ready?

We homeschool through a public charter school. Actually, this year, we are homeschooling through 2 charter schools, which is part of the reason I am feeling unprepared. Our son's (K-8) charter technically began last week, but I know the school and patterns well, felt informed, and was able to start preparing early. Our daughter got into a charter school for her high school school experience this year and I didn't have much information until a week or so ago. The bottom line is that, as of tomorrow, both charters have begun and Lala Bug has her first math class.

Our kids are learning all the time. I am accepting that, while I hold Waldorf Education in my heart and mind, our homeschool is more of an us-school experience now. I know, with that in mind, that we can dive in tomorrow and adjust to our new groove, our new rhythm, more slowly.

This year I have a 7th grader and 10th grader! Both my kiddos have learning differences and one is additionally differently wired. In addition to the school year starting, we will begin a more thorough evaluation for one kiddo and resume occupational therapy for the other.

We will start our days with Together Time, during which I read a shared book, we might watch CNN10, read poetry, have important conversations, or do other shared activities.

Our 7th grader will be taking several classes online with our charter. This is not how I want to approach schooling for either of my kids, but this is an atypical school year, we know the school and teachers well, they have been thoughtful about what will work for the kids, and since this is our main homeschool community, he will be with friends, even if not in person.

Brown Mouse will be starting the year slowly, adding up to math, a writing group, Constitution class, crpytography, Spanish (he expressed enthusiastic excitement about this one), and a Shakespeare book group (Julius Caesar). This is plenty, so science will be nature study and playful experimenting to start. Language Arts, for him, is a set selection of materials to address his learning differences.

Our 10th grader, based on how distance learning did and did not work for her in the spring, will take 2 classes online, with the live online portion being only an hour for each class; Geometry and American Government. For English, we will be reading texts of my choosing and pairing it with writing materials to help her build and feel more confident with her writing. Science is Chemistry. Her charter teacher approved our covering chemistry through fiber arts, with the support of texts, some kits, and her grandparents (a chemist and a former fiber artist). She is excited about that. I suspect much of the rest of her time will be spent dancing (although not in person!) and working on various fiber projects. She has switched from knitting to sewing with the warmth of late summer, but is prolific with both, as well as other crafts. She's got some goals in this area.

And me? I am working to not forget myself in the mix. I am trying to remember to lean into my strengths, not sacrifice myself (and my energy) for everyone else, and that, for me, means ongoing work around expectations, limits, and boundaries. What better to model for my growing kids this year?!

Wishing you well as we collectively launch into a strange new, current normal.

no little cabin in the woods

On this day last year, we packed up and headed home from our annual trip to the lake.

Two years ago, when it was time to schedule some time at the lake, we were told that there wasn't a time slot for us. After a little (probably a lot) of shifting and likely some sacrificing of days on the part of the growing (now multi-generational) family that owns the cabin, we got a week up there. We knew not to take it for granted.

This year, with the pandemic, the scheduling date came and went. We have had our own health concerns and uncertainty about travel, so when word came back that the family had filled the summer schedule due to no other travel plans, and there were no days for us, it was expected. But I turned off the computer and I cried.

This is the first summer that we don't get to spend time up there at the little house in the woods. This special place, accessible only by water, has been an annual get-away for my family since my older brother was an infant.  Every summer, since I began blogging, I have written about it, and I have to do so this year, even though I have no new moments to share, because a piece of me is missing. This place is my marker of time. It is where the cycle of my year is re-calibrated. Even now, typing this, seeing these images, posting links to past posts (below), I am emotional.

2020 is full of grieving, isn't it? So many lives lost. So much living lost. Racial, political, economic loss and tension. This is the year when nothing is the same. (And yet everything is the same, day after day, lost in sameness.)

There have been moments this summer, when I have been out for a hike or near water, and the splashing sound, or breeze through the trees, or the certain smell of the sun on the earth will spark a whole body feeling of being up there, and if I just close my eyes...

We have talked about taking a road trip up to the lake, just to hike or paddle. There is hesitation. "It's not the same." A few days in the cabin on the lake is the kind of sameness we need. We crave the celebratory anchors. We have known our time there might come to an end, but I will hold hope for next summer.

The last 4 years of posts from this particular blog.
2019
2018
2017
2016